Welcome to The WatchCat
Sunday, August 19 2018 @ 06:22 pm PDT

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Workout update

It's been a while since I've posted a workout update, largely because things have been going well. I've made substantial progress, although travel set me back a bit because between the actual travel and the subsequent sickness, I went about a month and a half without a regular workout routine. The losses were aggravating but nothing I worried about.

Until today.

Today's workout was Bad News. Humiliating as I stumbled out of the gym to my car. I made it through my usual weights and 15 minutes of the stair stepper (a slow 40 floors) before realizing that I wouldn't be able to keep it up for the length of time I wanted to work out. I switched to the elliptical but only lasted a few minutes there. (This was doubly embarrassing because I was wearing my USAF shirt.) Rubber muscles, heart rate that refused to return to normal... I sat in my car for about five minutes before realizing that it wasn't helping much. I was half hoping for a tap on my window of someone checking on me. (Not that I would have necessarily trusted this mythical person, but it would have been nice to have a chance of a second opinion on what the problem was.)

Some of the problem might have been muscle fatigue from Krav Maga the day before, although I thought I'd done ok. Not great; first day back never is, but I made it through the hour without anything worse than taking a 30 second breather. (Well, I have a fashionable array of bruises, but they're nothing new for the training.)

So I'm thinking that it comes back to diet and hydration, with an additional nod to the fact that my stress is high and my body a little off-kilter right now. I had eggs and toast this morning, but I was severely delayed in getting out the door this morning so the calories might not have been hanging around like they were supposed to. Normally two packets of oatmeal or a big bowl of whole milk yogurt and granola does the job, so I think I'll be going back to that. And my hydration this morning was bad...I freely admit it. But unfortunately, even after eating properly and hydrating I'm still feeling the ill effects, so I'm not entirely sure of what's going on.

So that's the current WatchCat Workout update. I'll hope to be back with better news soon.
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Trapped

The PTSD DiariesThings are really interesting right now. This going-off-medication thing is a royal pain. It's the right thing to do; I don't really need it any more and the negative side effects definitely outweighed the benefits. But this transition phase has knocked me off my game pretty thoroughly. (Doesn't help that I began it all in the middle of nasty jet lag.)

Normally my instincts have an almost frightening level of accuracy. It's not that I'm never wrong, but I'm often right on things I have no business knowing, in most people's opinions. That's gone out the window for the moment, and it's tough because I'm trying to make a major career decision. Actually it's pretty much made, at least for the next step, but I find myself second-guessing and I can't rely on instinct to clarify. I guess I'll just take my shot in the dark like everyone else and pray that it works out.

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Body Counts

General NewsThis morning I visited facebook only to discover that a friend was busy making comparisons between the US military and "Chemical Ali" for civilian death tolls. I couldn't believe it; he's a student of history who ought to know better.

He cited 3000 noncombatant deaths in the initial invasion of Iraq. It's so tempting to start digging out other statistics to compare: car accidents, abortions, heart disease, breast cancer...9/11...

But deaths of noncombatants (if that's indeed what they were) matter regardless of nationality.

We can talk about lives saved, we can talk about how Saddam Hussein dragged his own people into this. We can discuss roles of government and rules of engagement that often put our own people in harm's way in an attempt to protect anyone who MIGHT be a noncombatant.

Or we can talk about Haiti. 150,000 is the most recent number of deaths I've heard from the earthquake and subsequent disaster.

You may say that's unfair, that it's comparing acts of God with acts of man. We're rational creatures, enlightened and progressed into super-humans that love every person on earth. Hitler, Stalin, Bin Laden... they're just misunderstood, or they're criminals. It's the USA that bears the guilt... or so the mantra goes.

You want to talk about combatting terrorism through non-violent means? Stop telling the third world that their problems are America's fault.

It's interesting how we use the term "act of God" in many legal documents yet don't think about what it really implies. We don't want to think about it. Do we really want to think about an earthquake that killed 150,000 as an act of God? (Yes, I see the atheists nodding and the Christians squirming.) So who or what really gets blamed for death?

Death.

"I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I believe it all is coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come"
-Matchbox Twenty, "How Far We've Come"


There are many arguments over why it is that we all die. But the actual event is inevitable. The song quoted above always makes me laugh because it's about people trying to be "progressive" in the face of death. The prospect of death will bring out whatever is inside us, good or bad. One of many reasons that 9/11 seared me is that while it brought out the best in some, it brought out the worst in others near me.

Whatever it is that is responsible for Death happening at all...that's where we have to look if we really want to play the blame game.

Did you make the decision to pull the trigger, release the bomb, choose the target? You'll have questions of intent to struggle through, yes Consequences remain the same.

Yet intent divides the morality. Everything I know about the US military says that the vast majority go to extraordinary lengths to avoid noncombatant casualties. I just finished a history class; it seems like the only thing new under the sun is our military's passion for preserving civilian life.
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PJ Pics

PJ StuffMT. HOOD, Ore. - The 304th Rescue Squadron joined other volunteers in the search for two missing hikers atop Mount Hood near Portland Oregon. The 304th has participated in rescue efforts on Mount Hood through its history. (U.S. Air Force Photo/Senior Airman Adam Hoffmann)

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PJ Pics

PJ StuffKey West, Fla. - Air Force Reserve Pararescuemen, or PJs, from the 920th RQW, along with their Canadian counterparts, SARTechs train together during the 2009 Key West SAREX. (U.S. Air Force Photo/Staff. Sgt. Leslie Kraushaar)

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PSSSTTTTTT

PJ StuffI discovered today that images are not scaling down as they're supposed to for users of Internet Explorer, thus resulting in horrific loading times. As far as I know, Firefox and Safari are handling it just fine.

Sorry!

I'll be working on a fix for the code, but if I can't find one, I'll have to manually resize the images and store them on my own server instead of working with the links from the Air Force site.

I'm assuming this has been going on for days. If you notice a problem on the site, please do let me know so I can fix it promptly! Email me at cat@thewatchcat.net ...Please!
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PJ Pics

PJ StuffPararescuemen provide medical attention to an Afghan who has suffered gunshot injuries, Dec. 08, 2009. The Pararescuemen are able to rescue patients in any situation who need medical attention. The Pararescuemen are assigned to the 66th Expeditionary Rescue Squadron deployed to Camp Bastion, Afghanistan. (U.S. Air Force photo/Staff Sgt. Angelita Lawrence)

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PJ Pic

PJ StuffA Pararescueman provides area security while another HH-60G Pave Hawk is picking up a patient Dec. 8, 2009. The members of the 66th Expeditionary Rescue Squadron can respond to medical evacuations in less than seven minutes to pick up patients in need of care. The Pararescueman is assigned to the 66th Expeditionary Rescue Squadron. (U.S. Air Force photo/Staff Sgt. Angelita Lawrence)

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PJ Pics

PJ StuffPararescuemen assigned to Kadena Air Base, Japan, prepare for a high-altitude low-opening jump over Ie Shima Island, Japan, Dec. 23, 2009. The jump was part of routine training for the 320th Special Tactics Squadron and the 31st Rescue Squadron. (U.S. Air Force photo/Airman 1st Class Chad Warren)

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can't do it alone

SheepdogsRelationships are almost never the way we want them to be.

(I'm tempted to just hit the save button right now and see how everyone would comment, but I'll continue.)

One thing that I've been realizing on a deeper level lately is that pretty much everyone has at least one blind spot. Yes, I believe in communication, but there comes a point when we have to accept that some people just cannot understand certain things. Our society spends so much time discussing cultural diversity that we often expect the people who look like us to think like us. Yet often our differences are so sharp that they're best described as cultural differences. Military v. civilian. Sheep v. sheepdog. And sometimes there's no label for it, just a gulf formed of layers upon layers of mutual frustration.